Precious Twins of Mine...

I'm so happy to came across my twin boys photos that was captured at my friends wedding 9 years ago. They were 9 years old back then and was really cute to see. Looking at it makes me really missing and wanting them dearly. I just wish they stop growing at that age as that was the moment I was really needed most by them. The twins used to nagged me on things and will agitate me by teasing around with each other that lead them both quarrelling and run to me just to make me listen to who triggers who incident among them. At that point of time all I could remembered was being annoyed and would constantly telling them off to stop doing so. And that instance my wish was for them to grow up fast!!!

Emirul my second twin is always known as the cunning one who are born talented and also book and street smart. Emirul will always be the leader between them both and Emir is just a plain follower who cant decide on things most of the time. Emir too is born with brilliant IQ but somehow get over shadowed by his twin brother who are fortunately are gifted to manipulate and balance between book smart and street smart equally, that makes him more confident in making decisions at all times.

Emir would just obliged and agreed to his younger brother as he prefers joining him and get punished by it together rather left alone with nothing to do. I normally blamed Emir for Emirul's mistakes and keep reminding that as a big brother, he should take care of his 16 minutes younger brother by making sure his brother will not misbehaved and that if he does, its Emir that need to be punished more as he is being irresponsible for allowing it to happen.

As they grow, the contrast between both of them seems more obvious where Emirul stand with his own principal in life and that if its for better or worst are just besides the point. The bad thing about it is that he tend to be overconfident with himself and lead life by making decision with what he believed and that opinions of others are just not relevant to think about.

Emir on the other hand is so indecisive in whatever he does and would just stick to being a skeptical follower to whoever happen to be more manipulative and outstanding at that point of time. That carries him with no determination with any things he held or does and end up it being incomplete should there be any interference that may come along the way.

At teenager's life that full of exciting movements they are at now, my concerned and opinions meant nothing at all but just plain extreme nuisance for them to listen. I end up being a bad person who don’t seems to understand them at all resulting them creating distance towards me. I then bare their painful statement or actions by shutting myself off towards their satisfaction.

When scenerio like this occured, I just wish the twins are still my little cuddling boys where they will turn to me with hugs and kisses even when I'm at my highest level anger mode. I have to admit that I do miss the time they used to nagged me to come back home fast simply to hear them telling and asking me for things or even quarrelling for it...

In whatever age or behavior they are into, I believed my love for him will be placed the same as the first time their heart beat grown in me 17 years back... I can't wait for the day to come where I will be made important again in their life... Hope it would not be too long from now as waiting is just too pain to swallow most of the time... Insyallah..